Hard time

Soo…it’s been a pretty hard time for me…

My workout is weak and i get muscle pain and it gets so frustrating

And recently i found out that the military admission test has changed and i have to run 2 kilometers in 9 minute and a half…i can’t even run them in 10 minutes how it was before it changed….all i can do right now is 12 minutes…

I feel so down…in april i will have the admission and in still can’t run that fast…

I fell like i will never make it…

I know i have to stay strong and work more and more….but everyday i feel more close to the exam and i feel more and more unprepared….

I need to believe in myself but i just can’t right now….

I’m scared…and it’s just so hard…the training and learning and the routine….and i feel alone …because even though i have people around me…i feel they don’t really know my pain…

It’s so much pressure upom me because all my future depends on how i do now…and it just scares me…

I want to be a kid again and not have to think about future…why did i had to grow up ??  I was just fine as a kid…

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Blogger Recognition Award

I’ve been nominated for this blogger recognition award by   Fed 🙂 He is such an amazing person and I’m so happy I get to read about his life 🙂

Thank you so much for nominating me for this !

Rules:

  1. Write a post to show your award.
  2. Thank the blogger(s) who nominated you and share the link to their blog.
  3. Give a brief story of how your blog got started.
  4. Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers.
  5. Nominate 15 bloggers of your choice for the award.
  6. Comment on each blog to let them know that you’ve nominated them and provide a link to your post.

 

How Pieces of me started

Well i guess even the title says it all…I started it as a diary like blog in wich I can post things about my life as a 19 years old…about my thoughts and dreams 🙂

I know writing down thoughts is really healthy so I try to stick to it but I post rarely so i guess I might post more tho

I’m still new around here as i have this blog for like 6 months but haven’t post so much…so yeah 🙂

Advice to new bloggers

Well first of all I think it’s important to be active in the comunnity…to follow many blogs you enjoy and read them most of the time and give likes and comments when you feel like it. This will make you feel like a part of their life/journey and I think it’s a wonderfull feeling.

A second advice will be to download the wordpress app and write everytime you feel the need to, because if you don’t do it right away then you’re thoughts and ideeas will fly away and it’s a shame that they didn’t got written down.

And never think that what you write is not worth to post. I promise it is!

 

15 blogs nominated by me

I’m so very shy about this but i’ll give it a try. So here are some random blogs i follow..it was too hard to choose so i picked kind of random..

serendipity

amommasview

Alanna

Roger

waywardwordssite

Andy Oldham

Teri

Sena

Elm

AJ Ash

randomvibes

Vihasi Shah

mjslow

Price’s Pretties

Stuart

 

With lovee

Kitty

I love him

​I love him…

I love him when he’s talking about something passionate…i love him when he’s greeting everyone just like a little retarded….i love how silly he is sometimes…i love when he sings because even if he doesn’t have a good voice he feels it so much and he’s making me feel it too 

I love that if i touch him while sleeping…he would grab me…and hold me…

I love when he’s asleep…i love to watch him sleeping like
that…quiet…peacefully…i feel protected…i actually feel
we’re protected…just like we’re the only people in the entire world….just us…just him breathing slowly…sleeping peacefully…i feel like crying when i watch him like this…because he’s just so perfect for me…and i love him so so much…and i could not imagine my life without him…

I love how he acts like a little child when he needs affection and i don’t really give him enough…
I love how he knows me so well he actually understands how i feel and think….better that i will ever be able to understand myself…
I love him when he’s like “meeeh”….cuz he’s so cute…
I love how he accept me just the way i am…and i love how he encourage me to do things and to develop myself more and more…
He’s the reason i’m here today….because he’s the person that changed the way i feel about myself…he changed the way i feel about life…
He just taught me how to love myself…how to be stronger…how to never ever give up….how to believe in myself…and to actually enjoy and love life…
He’s the miracle to my life…and i love him ♡

Art

“In a room full of art I’d still stare at you”

I think we ourself are the true art…we humans…are so complicated, have so many dreams, feelings, thoughts…

How we even manage to create our life in the way we have it? I mean…we bond with other people…and learn things and make decisions…and work for everything…and it all seems “as it should be”…normal…but i think it’s amazing…how we get through life…how we build ourself from little pieces…

I think we are the art and the artists of ourself…every single day…building each other…growing…living…

Isn’t life amazing? How are we not the biggest piece of art we know? 

We should just stop sometimes…and admire people around us…and most important ourself…because we have so much beauty in us…

and we are art…

Worth of life

So here is this old friend named Ana and i kinda feel bad for her because she is so strong and beautiful but she doesn’t have any luck in love or anyting really and she feels so down…and i wish i could make her feel better…i wish i could give her some self esteem and some courage to live the life she has…cuz she’s so damn young and the world is so big and amazing and even if life is hard sometimes…it’s worth it if you find the happiness in the little things…

I used to be depressed and anxious and i cried all the time and hated life and had very very low self esteem…i tried to kill myself and all…but one day…i got better…i know my boyfriend helped me so much…and maybe love healed the wounds i kept in me…

My mom has a word ” Don’t take life too seriously…you’ll never get out  alive anyway” 

And it is kinda true…i mean…if i ever feel like life is no longer what i want and is not worth living…i’m gonna run away…and make all the things i never had courage to do…and just find the reason to live…

It’s such a silly thing to give up life…you must be a coward…

I’m glad i didn’t manage to kill myself.